Howling 

 I always loved going to the upcountry whenever I had a chance. But this became unbearable when it come to swimming which was mostly done in the river. By the age of ten.. I knew how to swim but not in a river but in a swimming pool. So the holidays came and I went to see my grandma.. Funniest bit is I really don’t know how we survived because she is practically illiterate and I didn’t know my mother tongue that much then.. I used to reply to her inaudible rumblings with simple Swahili like

“Sawa ,nimeelewa Ama ntafanya” 

Which actually mean okay, I have understood you or I will do what you want. 

This earned me sneers because she actually thought that I was abusing her. My native cousins would laugh hard at me for the misunderstanding between grandma and me..though it made me feel lesser I just had to hope that one day we would actually communicate. So, a day came and I was invited for a swim by my cousins and their friends.. Happy atleast they knew about swimming but a rude shock on the site of swimming… A river… Actually a high speed flowing river.. I chickened out but their jeers had me in my underwear and getting some solid ground on what point to go for.. 

Soon I was in the river but with my hand on the surface and a panicked me gasping for air. I couldn’t comprehend what exactly took place but I woke up at the bank with a newly established phobia for swimming pool.I went back to the homestead and snuggled at my grandmas side as she roasted yams for the evening meal. 

At least she understood my body language and actually made the fire bigger and later told stories that I didn’t have a clue what they were about

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HAPENINGS

Lately I have been focusing on creating something new… African lady has pearls in her life which come in many forms. She has been adopted to dealing with alot… But there’s always the fun part. An introduction to my life would seem fair.. Being the last kid didn’t make life any easier… First of all you will always be the kid and the adventures depend on various things like your area of upbringing. Personally,I have been brought up in the ghetto community. This is where amenities are foreign.Though the government shows little effort which actually is not any effort at all since it majorly hides behind foreign aid in the name of poverty and development.The fun part was accostuming to survival.. Where you had to learn how to face both verbal and physical bullies… Being short and brilliant added some sour sauce on top of my miserable life. I tried hard to run but they always caught up with me. It’s not rare to go home late due to performing others duties  in fear of having your books in the mad or actually loosing them for good. Yeah I know it’s definitely not the fun part of life but the best was knowing that you could always make them pay.Tricks were fun and making them cry was the best since it meant having them on the edge for a pretty long time. Once the it girls had a rumour going on that I actually was a lesbian.. I know it’s weird but though africans play cool when it comes to homo-stuff trust me they despise it. So I actually don’t like being on people’s lips.. I did what a normal nerd does… Hide from the crowd but when confronted by the bad girl adoration point came as a saving shot. I thought of my decency but rewinded it and decided why not paste my name on their lips for a longer period. I just stayed a simple week of hanging out with the it guy and made sure all the gossipers knew of it. 

Words,,,phrases,, quotes 

This has been my thing for the longest time I can recall… Filling up my gallery with pictorial quotes.. Mainly to boost my esteem and give me a reason to hold on… For the quite some time  I have been focusing on creating something for me.. And maybe even grow it to something worth the African respect… Mostly what ladies do is never recognised.. Practically some of we.. Ladies.. Make it even harder to get the chance or attention our achievements deserve.I know specifications maybe abit harsh.. I don’t mean to mean that all the other options can’t prove right but one thing I have witnessed is how ladies lower themselves to fit in the society..mainly in African countries where the baby girl is to grow up and study to a certain level and then forgo her dreams in the name of bringing up a family.Having a focussed personality sometimes proves dangerous.. The was a time I was at my grandmas house and all she told me is to take care of myself and not to study so much otherwise I won’t get a husband..”Men fear a learned lady… You will end up all alone”.This had me wandering around mostly because I don’t think I need marriage in order to have a happy life.. African version of marriage is in order to satisfy the Society’s belief of existence  and reproduce.Frankly..I have had to deal with friends who stay around in relationships though unhappy due to fear of judgement of being alone or single at a certain age.. The words the community whispers in the dark.,,the condemning words in some of the African proverbs and the burden in the name of responsibility the african lady has to deal with.. I believe happiness in life matters more than anything. One thing my world has taught me is that you decide to be happy on your own and create your own happiness. Virtues of the community, if not anything that has any value to you, don’t let it dictate your beliefs, choices or your life in general. 

Embracing your being 

  1. Since I was little I had the ability to shine in academics.This comes prior to alot of expectations and a parent’s preference of the white collar jobs for their kids but my passion for text both reading and writing showed when I was literally 7 years old.In the Kenyan system of education,their are text that students have to read in their O levels and A level.. I had practically  completed reading my elder sister’s  A level set books while still in my O levels….though I performed well in my studies generally ,I didn’t expect literature  to be my it thing.I was always motivated to be either an engineer or a lawyer … Right now I am in university and pursuing literature… Guess this was my destiny… Tried to fight it actually for almost an year and a half but always hitting a dead point.. Recently discovered writing Jobs online and would graciously love to share with my audience and anyone seeking to earn money through online writing checks out the following link. http://appesay.com./writing jobs/

LOYALTY, LOVE, TRUST

Most of us believe that these three co-exist….but my main question is what is the most important of all… Is it loyalty… Trust me I have no idea too

Lately I have been indoors things don’t always turn out the way we expect.. You know the usual stuff but this round broken trust held me up on my couch for three weeks… I have no tears and I don’t know how to explain the pain because tears won’t help.. I have no budge chocking me due to anger… It’s just the pain of disappointment and lack of the need to fix it because if it is for the time and energy invested… Did the person who wronged me ever put them in mind.. Actually not even the time I invested but the one he/she did 

Do we examine every action we take… Or the attitude of facing the consequences later got us trying out everything ..

I have prayed.. Sung my vocals out even played the nothing happened act but actually no change… I feel like I just exist… The heat in Kenyan coast is really on my nerves… All I do is get up braid my hair into two cornrow.. Read a novel while listening to some soothing music and lots of Pentatonix acapela till evening when I grab my phone check my emails and sit by the window while sipping iced tea…. 

I guess that all I hold on to is time to erase this normadity of pain in some way  betrayal …guess you have to be loyal so that trust start taking over but one thing I am sure of… Love has nothing to do with this two

Silence is always the loudest cry 

The outdoor in most of the cases is a platform of chances, opportunities and expectations plus trials. Experimentation of our skills and also practise of our beliefs.. Existence in the current situation of most  African countries is the survival of the fittest… Leadership on its bleak point… One hopes for better after pain but the people have to live on no expectations as disappointments and oppression of every kind dominates.. From corrupt government and politicians to the  lowest rank.. The people themselves do not spare each other. 

Countries for instance Kenya.. Having had a history of restless election periods.. How about we Kenyans think of ourselves for once.. The fighting and blood shed back in 2007 should have been our taste of bitter sweet on being always the victims… The funniest bit is we destroy ourselves one lifts a machete over a brother’s head because of leadership and paupered payment that can’t get anyone anywhere.. 

Humanity is the best thing to hold on to….The happiness of seeing everyone dealing with life the most possible way.Voting is everyone’s  right in a democratic country.. The leaders are asking for your votes.. But let us always have it in our minds that they lead us.. We make the decision on whether their leadership suits us or not.. A united front always beats the odds… 

Let’s vote peacefully and make sure that our effort and fruits borne don’t go to waste in a flash of time… The greatest investment that always has uncertain results of the future.. I urge all Kenyans to vote wisely and think about themselves and loved ones before taking uneccesaary actions against one another… Peace is rewarding for the soul and spirit 

Silence of being contented 

Many have had a fabulous love week….regrouping with loved ones and showering appreciation in form of words,poetry and also gifts of many kinds.. But the best gift ever is a lovers look… The tender smile and the sincere expression on their faces when they see how happy you are for the gift they brought home. That sense of security and every stolen glimpse that always sends a chill through your body… Many have stolen moments due to the busy  life most have to keep up with…. But in this week.. How about showing all the love in us.. Share it with your loved ones because tomorrow is always an optimistic idea that everyone holds on to

Cherish and hold.. Never let go of what you hold dearest